What do you think of YO MAMA?

[Cassie]

Dads = fail for a lot of kids these days. They don't give a crud about their offspring. They need to learn that whether they like it or not, they have to take care of what THEY spawned. Why is it only mother's who seem to grab this concept? {rolleyes}

My dad is a... none of the words to describe him are healthy for this forum. But I haven't seen him for 6 years anyway. I've seen my brother a couple of times since he was born [he's like 3 or 4 now] but never with dad there. He's never bought me a birthday or Christmas present in my life. Never wrote to me. Doesn't give my mum any money at all towards my keep. Doesn't give a crap basically. I'm leaving it there because otherwise I'll post things that aren't good for a public forum and belong in my PM's folder only.

[yummybunny]

They aren't aware, or probably won't even care how their actions affect their kids.

There are a lot of fatherless boys that have kids now, and they won't leave their kids for anything, because they don't want their kids to go through the same thing, but there are also those men that had no fathers, that passes on the deadbeat father tradition.

The effects on daughters is different.  Like I am afraid to totally give my trust to a man.  If I ever get married, I would like prepare for him to leave me and my kids.  You know what I mean, it's harder to trust men, especially girls like me, who had no positive male role model in my life.  All the males in my life let me down, besides my uncles, but I only talk to like 2 of my 12 uncles, and don't even think about the rest.

[Majick]

I love my dad.  He is my best friend.

He has worked hard his whole life, and has always tried to make sure I had everything I ever wanted/needed.  And even if we couldn't afford what I wanted/needed, he still made sure I knew that it wasn't because I didn't love me.  Growing up, my dad was always the head of our family.  He was tough, but he loved us.  He never hit me, not once.  My mom always did the spankings, because my dad didn't feel right hitting us.  He took my brother and sister in as though they were his, even though they were already 6 months and 2 years old.  When he introduced my mother to his, and she thought my sister was his, he didn't correct her, because far as he was concerned, they were his kids.  The only reason he never adopted them, was because it just cost too much, and my family never had a lot of money.

There are a LOT of dead-beat dads out there, several of my friends with kids have dead-beat dads or the father's of their kids are the dead-beat dads.  I feel blessed everyday that my father was there for us, and loved us all equally.

[Cassie]

(14-04-2009 01:19 AM)PiplupIsDaCutest! link Wrote:They aren't aware, or probably won't even care how their actions affect their kids.

There are a lot of fatherless boys that have kids now, and they won't leave their kids for anything, because they don't want their kids to go through the same thing, but there are also those men that had no fathers, that passes on the deadbeat father tradition.

The effects on daughters is different.  Like I am afraid to totally give my trust to a man.  If I ever get married, I would like prepare for him to leave me and my kids.  You know what I mean, it's harder to trust men, especially girls like me, who had no positive male role model in my life.  All the males in my life let me down, besides my uncles, but I only talk to like 2 of my 12 uncles, and don't even think about the rest.

Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. Though I have sort of had a male role model in my life. Well, not exactly a role model per se, but a father figure. He didn't live with us but he was my mum's friend who stayed every other weekend, bought me presents on birthdays and christmas etc, took me swimming and bowling and all the other things normal kids do. Gave me pocket money. So he was kind of like my dad, just not around 24/7 or related to me biologically. But then when I was 15 he went alcoholic, turned into a wackjob, tried to make me and my mum homeless and went into therapy. So that ends that story.   [what I found amusing is, he thinks he killed my mum. Srsly. That is the effect of alcohol my friends.]

I'm having a little falling out with my mum over something now, but it's cool, we always fall out. {rolleyes}

And Majick, you should feel blessed and lucky. I envy every person who has a mum AND a dad who loves and cares about them. {yes}

[Majick]

Oh believe me.  I do feel very blessed.

Not many people have the kind of relationship with their parents that I do.  Even though I do not entirely like my mom, I love her dearly, and we do get along, just ... not for extended periods of time and in close quarters lol

Now my sister on the other hand ... lol xD that's a whoooole other can of worms there.

[2qewl4u]

You don't like your sister? xD
I love my 2 sisters even though we fight ALOT xD But that's part of siblings love imo =P

[Majick]

My sister is ... special.

She had scarlet fever when she was a baby, which has left her mentally younger than she is physically.  She's 38, but acts like she's 26 ... Even as a teenager, I was more mature and reliable than she was, and she was 26, married and living on her own.

She's always had a complex ... even though my dad always treated her the same as he did me, she would always throw it in my face "Well I know dad loves you more, cause you're his REAL daughter and I'm not."  Even though my dad CONSTANTLY told her she was his daughter far as he was concerned.

My sister has a BAD habit of lying, exaggerating, and being sneaky.  Love her dearly, but again ... small doses, and wide open spaces are the only way we can get along these days.  She's also got several problems with Depression and Anxiety, and things only got worse after our brother died (she was also in an abusive marriage that got worse because my brother wasn't around anymore to protect her).

[2qewl4u]

I think you have to put up with her, since as you said she is mentally ill?

[Majick]

She's not Mentally Ill, per se.

She just has issues because of the fever when she was a child.  It's just that she's not nearly as Mature as she should be for her age.  She'll always behave younger than she actually is, but as she gets older, it won't be so noticeable.

But, 38 is still kind of young, so it's as though she's 26-28 or so.  Gradually she'll catch up to her age, but it'll never be 100%